11 Mar 09 SOCIETY CONDEMN SEX FOR CHILDREN
In our type of society such activities are condemned and because, for most children, sex is not mentioned, or is mentioned in a condemnatory manner, many children form the opinion that sex is dirty and feel guilty if they enjoy fondling their genitals. As two American sociologists, William Simon and John Gagnon, say: ‘. . . learning about sex is learning about guilt: conversely, learning how to manage sex constitutes learning how to manage guilt’.
The belief that sex is dirty is encouraged by small actions. Boys are taught it is ‘bad’ to fondle their penis (‘If you don’t leave it alone, I’ll cut it off). Small girls are taught to cover their chests long before any breast development has occurred, and to sit with their legs together long before the child’s vulva has developed in any way. Both sexes are taught that their genitals are a ‘shameful’ area, and that it is ‘good’ to keep them covered at all times.
During the childhood years, the child’s sexuality can be damaged by the way its parents behave in sexual matters and by their reaction to its curiosity about sexuality.
If parents let the child know, by their behaviour, that they believe the unclothed human body to be indecent, and that the genital area is scandalous and unmentionable, they may plant the seeds for later sexual disability. Many parents encourage their children to be competitive, even if this requires violence, but when a child seeks to understand why boys and girls have different genitals and to look at the genitals of a child of the other sex, or play with its own genitals, a frozen disapproval appears and the child is often punished. This induces shame in the child’s mind about its genitals. It may also induce guilt, because the child has enjoyed what it was doing, but now feels this was wrong because of its parents’ disapproval.
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Tags: Men’s Health
